Expectations and Growth
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You don’t always get what you expect.
It’s ironic that this is a common theme for me in my writings - expectations - disappointment and growth. Maybe there is something here for me to learn - or relearn - or keep on learning. The excitement of the first day of my recent photography retreat in Jouvence Quebec led me to expect all sorts of amazing photographs to be made in subsequent outings and the morning of day 2 just didn’t live up to those expectations.
Mist covered lake and the promise of a colourful sunrise, but meh (i.e., uninspiring) images. (EXIF data f10, 105mm, 1/200s, ISO6400)
Interestingly we’d had a conversation about something similar the evening before - Jean-Pierre spoke of a workshop he’d been to many years ago where he’d been given an assignment the first day and he’d nailed it! The feedback and discussion were full of promise and potential - leading him to think that he understood what he was at the workshop to learn - bring on the next assignment please! Unfortunately, things did not pan out as expected - the next image did not live up to his expectations of feedback - in fact the instructors were at a bit of a loss as to what sort of feedback to give - finally asking whose image it was and what were his intentions - what did he want to get across with the image? After much discussion they recognized what he was trying to achieve and provided all sorts of useful suggestions on how to better achieve that vision. While his expectations did not live up to the reality of the situation, he learned some valuable lessons and as a result experienced significant growth - lessons that still resonate today.
Misaligned conditions
The second day conditions seemed ideal - mist rising from the lake, early morning start (pre sunrise), a few clouds - everything should have been perfect. However nothing much seemed to be catching my eye - pulling my attention - not like the previous morning where backlit leaves danced before my eyes and I felt a bit like someone with scattered thoughts - squirrel! squirrel!
This morning there was enough low level cloud or concentrated mist that the rising sun was not able to break through - no backlight - in fact not much light at all - very flat - meh! Lately I’ve been obsessed with backlight and I wanted backlight!
You don’t always get what you want or expect. The key is to be able to pivot and make something out of the conditions you are given. I was struggling to pivot.
Now misty conditions can be a photographer’s dream - the moodiness - the mystery and the subtle shapes and colours that emerge from the fog. Well you need to have a clear subject for that to work and somehow I was struggling to find something that captured my attention. What was going wrong? - only the day before I couldn’t photograph quickly enough to capture all of the images that were filling my brain and today - nothing.
I have learned that when I go out with strong expectations I can actually talk myself out of taking images if the conditions do not match that internal dialogue and vision. This is what was happening this morning - the conditions were different from what I had experienced the day before and I was struggling to pivot and move on to a different sort of image. I decided that it was important for me to pause and regroup or go back to the cabin and crawl into bed.
I find that pulling out my tripod is a great way to regroup and slow down - finding a composition and setting up my gear forces me to slow down and really consider what my intentions are with the image. I found a tree with vibrant red leaves and I decided to focus on capturing the colours of autumn - nothing amazing came from the images, but it got me to stop and look around and really start to see what was grabbing my attention. The tripod wasn’t helping me to capture the feeling of autumn leaves dancing on the branch which was drawing my attention.
An intentional camera movement (ICM) of autumn leaves against the lake in the background and the forest floor of yellow and brown leaves. EXIF data f20, 105mm, 1/2.5sec, ISO80
Fast forward a few more minutes delving into what was capturing my attention and what I wanted to capture - I took my camera off the tripod and started to play with motion to try and capture that dancing movement of the colourful autumn leaves.
Oh yes! - there was something here - something more engaging, so I kept playing - change up my exposure and give more time for movement - add a bit more of a jiggle to my hand movement - small movements - yes!
The image that emerged certainly came much closer to what I was seeing in my mind - the feeling I wanted to capture.
Rest and Repeat
The week felt like this scenario on repeat. While I was chasing nonexistent backlight along the shoreline, my friends had headed to the beaver pond and saw amazing mist conditions and light that inspired some of the most awe inspiring images of the week. It was the only day with these conditions as the temperature rose and mist was elusive. A missed opportunity.
Magog city centre through the lens of multiple exposure ICM - criss cross technique. (EXIF data f20, 1/8s, 50mm, ISO64)
I headed to the beaver pond the next morning to find no mist and windy conditions that didn’t make for good reflections, but when I let go of those expectations I started to play and I found something different to express my sense of autumn. Valerie had done a wonderful job tutoring us on a multiple exposure technique the day before. She calls this technique criss cross and while it is usually used for architectural subjects like the one from Magog - I started to use it for nature subjects and it really got me excited at the possibilities.
This informed and inspired my photography for the rest of the week, so while I didn’t get the conditions that I was hoping for - I did unlock some wonderfully creative images. I also believe that I will be incorporating this into my photography going forward and finding different ways of expressing what I see and feel.
Autumn leaves at Jouvence using multiple exposure ICM. (EXIF data f18, 1sec, 35mm, ISO64, 6 stop ND filter)
Invaluable lessons
A different day and slightly different conditions led me to change up my settings again and experiment to find that I captured a different feeling - less of the soft muted colours of autumn, but now something more vibrant with rain slick saturated colours. My delight and enthusiasm expanded as I tried different ways of capturing the seasonal colour. These were images that excited me and really felt the way I was experiencing the autumn here in Quebec.
This week in Jouvence has taught (and re-taught) me some important lessons. When I let go of expectations and am more open to new thoughts and ideas then I can get into flow much more easily. It is good to have some ideas of what I want to photograph as this informs what lens/gear (such as tripod) to bring and where to look - having no constraints tends to make me a bit like a headless chicken and unable to make any clear decisions. However, when conditions do not match expectations or when something different than expectations presents itself - being able to pivot is the difference between returning with an empty memory card and being filled with wonder.
Do you find that you are able to be flexible and shift with changing conditions easily, or do you have to do some self talk to pivot? I’d love to hear about your thoughts in the comments below or reach out to me directly by clicking on the Connect With Me button. I’d also be interested in your thoughts of the different images that I created during this trip.
The feeling of autumn in Jouvence. (EXIF data f16, 1/2.5sec, 50mm, ISO 80)
I hope you’ll come back soon, share a cuppa, relax and enjoy more of my musings.
