Imposter syndrome
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When can we call ourselves proficient at a new skill?
I have been seriously taking photographs for almost 10 years now and during that time I’ve taken thousands of photos, however (no surprise) not all of them have been “keepers” (that is ones that are worth keeping and bragging about or printing them). I must admit that when I first started taking photos, I sometimes despaired of ever becoming consistent at capturing images that I would be proud to show to others. That sentiment quickly morphed into despairing of ever taking images that truly reflected what I saw in my mind’s eye - my photographic evolution has been marked by occasions of disappointment and despair.
I think that photography is a bit like golf - every once in a while you have a great shot that keeps you hanging on to the thought that you might just be good at this only to come back to reality when the same situation results in a series of duds. It’s that occasional wow shot that keeps me going.
In pursuit of more wow shots I have taken a number of photography courses and workshops which really taught me that the foundation for taking creative and amazing images is knowing your camera well. I don’t mean knowing every function or button, but knowing key functions and buttons that you need to be able to change without stopping and looking - this is called developing muscle memory. Being able to change shutter speed, aperture and ISO as well as exposure compensation are key fundamental skills. With bird photography I’d add being able to change focusing mode (from single point to the various tracking modes) is also an important skill.
It has definitely taken thousands of clicks of my shutter button to be able to capture images such as this - freezing the motion and getting what I want in focus. (EXIF data f9.0, 1/1600s, 840mm, ISO1100, -0.67EV)
There is an oft quoted “rule” called the 10,000 hours of practice to master a skill rule that Malcolm Gladwell made popular in his book “Outliers”. Photographers have taken that “rule” and modified it to say that you need to take 10,000 photographs before you can claim to have mastered the skill. I’ll bet those that coined this version of the “rule” didn’t foresee cameras with burst modes that can take dozens of frames a second - making it easy to hit 10,000 images without achieving mastery.
The idea is that spending focused time practicing your craft will lead to achieving mastery of the skill - I would argue that there may need to be a bit more than just practicing a craft to achieve mastery - there may need to be some inherent talent or ability that practice allows to flourish. It’s also important to note that mastery and developing a proficiency aren’t the same thing either.
What is needed to call yourself a photographer?
A significant number of photographers are self taught and this is even more prevalent today with easy access to equipment and the digital age which makes taking photographs more affordable. Back in the film days there was not the instant feedback of an LCD screen or the ability to take high speed bursts of images. As a result I sense that there is something of a divide among photographers. Fine arts educated photographers or certified photographers (usually requiring written exams and portfolio assessments by a panel of experts) can often be a way of differentiating photographic knowledge and technical skill level, however while certification can provide a sense of credibility and possibly professionalism - I’m not sure that it makes for a better photographer.
Many talented photographers I know are not certified nor do they hold a higher education diploma. Does that make them a non professional or an imposter? At what point can you start thinking and calling yourself a photographer - is it when you sell/exhibit your work or your skill/time? Is it when you achieve a certain level of technical skill - what about creativity? The debate of this topic goes on and on!
I know many amazing photographers who struggle with this - this imposter syndrome - not knowing or believing that they are proficient, talented or worthy of being called a photographer or even worse an artist or creative. I will raise my hand at this point and admit that I am often afflicted with these thoughts. I am not a fan of photography competitions or certification panels as I feel it is very subjective judging and let’s be honest - I feel like I judge myself harshly enough and I don’t need someone else adding to those negative thoughts. In fact, I would say that I find it very hard to get effective and constructive feedback or critiques. I have been part of online groups where you can post your images and ask for feedback or pose specific questions - only to receive responses such as great image! or tack sharp focus! These are not the sorts of comments that I find helpful in pushing myself to explore further.
Capturing the feeling I get when I see a grouping of ferns in the forest. (EXIF data multiple (3) exposure ICM f14, 1/8s, 83mm, ISO100)
In my opinion photography is a creative art form and the longer you practice your craft the more techniques you learn and the more time you spend honing your skills the more consistent you will become. Even more importantly I think that time helps to build confidence in my skills - I have found that the more I allow myself to play and create then things change for me - I no longer seem to care as much what other people think of my work. I value feedback from a trusted few, but I’m still willing to step out and own my own work if I like it or think it has value/merit or is a stepping stone to something else. Others may not like or value what I create, but this is becoming less important to me over time.
My recent trip to Jouvence Quebec really reinforced this for me. I was surrounded by three amazingly talented photographers who have developed their craft in uniquely different ways. I find that I trust them to provide me with balanced and honest feedback - not all of it resonates with me, but a great deal of it does. Having this sort of a safe space for exploring new ideas and getting thoughts and suggestions on how to improve or develop my images and approach is invaluable.
A mini rant or perhaps just poking fun at myself
I don’t often give in to rants, however there are some photography related phrases and concepts that I find a bit irksome. There is a whole vocabulary that has been developed by photographers in order to make this activity incomprehensible to “outsiders” and that irks me too. I try to avoid using these terms, but I do find them slipping out of my mouth occasionally.
There’s the pixel peeper or pixel peeping which refers to examining images at 100%+ magnification in order to scrutinize minute details. This does seem excessive as the intent of a photograph is not to view it at 1000x magnification. A close relative to the pixel peeper is the chimper or chimping which means previewing the image you’ve just shot on the back of the camera’s LCD screen immediately (like after every image) and in the process of doing that missing some amazing action shots because your attention is glued to the screen.
I would have to say that my personal pet peeve comes from some terms that can be used as soft put downs of other photographers. There is the SOOC (Straight Out of Camera) photographer who boasts that they don’t edit their images - they work to get them perfect in camera. I’m not sure that this is a boast worthy skill - I mean - who cares? I don’t look at an image and deem one better than another because there was or wasn’t editing - I look at an image and determine whether it moves me - emotionally or intellectually. I look at the photographer’s skill being their ability to capture something that causes me to pause and really look.
Definitely not a SOOC shot - I shoot images in a format called RAW that requires I do some editing to enhance the image (our phones and cameras that shoot in Auto mode do this and create JPEG formats). EXIF data f6.3, 1/250s, 600mm, ISO1000, +0.33EV
Of course there are the funny photography slang terms that just make me smile. For example, shutterbug which is American slang for someone passionate about taking photographs and also Shutter Nutter which is the British equivalent. I’ve talked about GAS (Gear Acquisition Syndrome) link to blog post and there is Spray and Pray - someone who shoots on burst mode hoping that one image will be in focus and what they wanted to capture.
There’s the decisive moment which is a concept from Henri Cartier-Bresson, a renowned street photographer, which refers to capturing the peak of an action or expression. Bang-bang (I've not heard this one before) which is a photojournalism slang for violent or conflict imagery - and my personal favourite - Food Porn which refers to appetizing, often highly stylized food photography.
The longer I do this….
The more I focus on what I want to achieve and learn and grow in my skills and creative expression and the less I care about having credentials or prizes. Do I like when someone finds my images interesting or beautiful? Of course I do. There is always going to be a part of me that seeks external approval, however I’m finding that I am content to keep making images for myself - for my reasons and when I’m in the zone or flow I know that nothing else matters but the creating - at that moment I am not only a photographer, but I am an artist.
Do you ever have those imposter syndrome thoughts about anything? I’d love to hear your thoughts or how you overcome these bouts of indecision/insecurity in the comments below or drop me a line directly by clicking on the Connect With Me button.
The last traces of autumn - urban landscape of downtown Calgary from Prince’s Island Park. (EXIF data multiple exposure (3) ICM f16, 50mm, 1/20s, ISO64)
I hope you’ll come back soon, share a cuppa, relax and enjoy more of my musings.